It seems that the holidays can bring about traditions for some. I know that for some of you when you hear the word “tradition,” you may think of the Hank Williams song (which is totally fine, by the way), or you may think “oh! We put our tree up the day after Thanksgiving, that’s our tradition.”
Whatever the case may be, a tradition is when customs or beliefs can be passed down from generation to generation, or you may have a long-established custom that can be shared with others.
The Hoekstra family tradition this time of year is picking out the perfect tree at Eckert’s in Belleville. We have a system for looking at trees which goes a little something like this:
Everyone walks through where the Christmas trees are placed. We eventually would love to go cut our own, but for now, we will settle with the pick-your-own-that-has-been-cut-for-you area. We all try to find the perfect one, then we gather up at the entry way to the outdoor store and show off our selections. You have to be careful in this process. Last year, I found the perfect tree and while I was looking at the choices of my family members, it was gone! Horrifying, because then I was put on the spot to scramble and find another “selection,” I had that moment in the back of my mind and did not want it to happen again!
So, this year Sam’s selection won our family tree award. It is the perfect size and now that it is home and decorated it is the perfect Christmas tree.
Sometimes I have mixed feelings about the holidays. I worked retail for many years, so Christmas music is a hard pill for me to swallow. I cringe when I hear it in October, and I stare down anyone in my vehicle who just sings along to every song on the Holly channel. I have favorites, though. I love hymnals and traditional Christmas music (see, there’s that word again).
When I was younger we had a tradition of getting up (or me waking my siblings up) and before we opened presents we had to get our stockings first. Wake up, stockings, presents, family meal with my grandparents. I looked forward to that for many years, even in my teens, I desperately wanted to get to presents before my stocking, but tradition, ya know?
Family members have since passed, there’s no meal at my Grandma’s house anymore, there’s no Christmas Eve celebration with my Grandparents, and Christmas became a little more complicated after I divorced. The holidays lost their real meaning for me, and at times, they were downright miserable. After that, the kids spent certain times of the holiday season with their dad, and then with me. Then we started to have friends who reached out to us, to me, and that was a huge blessing to not feel so empty, alone, and unwanted.
Christmas cards, carols, decorations, gift exchanges, food, and even music were hard for me. So.hard. There were times I just wanted to scream, curl up in a ball, not even put up a tree. I felt alone. I felt lost. I didn’t want to celebrate, and I sure as heck didn’t want to remember the reason for the season because, well, the season flat out sucked.
It took a lot of “bad Christmases” to get to the good ones. It took an old way of looking at things to realize that the new, unexpected traditions were welcomed, were enjoyed, and something I looked forward to, despite how my Grinch heart felt for years.
I love prepping for Christmas, despite how difficult it use to be. It is sometimes hard to get into the spirit, but it is also hard to hide how much I love seeing my kids when we find the tree (even if we don’t get the ones they “pick”), and I also love seeing the tree up with lights on and decorations on, too. I admit, I’ve had a hard time getting in the mood for the holidays, I feel rundown, tired, and I’m just ready for the semester to be over…but I do love my family and our tree tradition!
Our road trip started with some smiles and cuddles. Memphis joined us again on our tree outing! He was having fun riding with the kids in the back seat of the truck!
I’d like to think our family selfie game is on point, but here, Memphis is not cooperating.
The boys found the perfect one and were ready to load the tree!!!
