What matters to you in a friendship? What do you look for in friends? Do you have some of your childhood friends in your life to this day?
*Raising hand* I do.
And I am lucky, thankful, happy to be blessed in the friend department. Sometimes it is just nice knowing that you have people who “get you.”
What do I love about my friends?
- They are kind. I have had moments of raging gopher ugly crying with a number of friends. They haven’t shut me out, they listen and they have my back. They keep me grounded and they are supportive of me, my family, my dreams, and my wild ideas (from time to time).
- They care. When they hurt, I hurt, and vice versa. They care about my family, my job, my health, and they listen. They even care about Memphis, our other dogs, and our overall well-being.
- They support me. When I was a grad student who felt like I was losing my mind, I had a posse that made sure I was fed, had coffee, internet, and a place to study or crash on non-kid weeks. They encourage me, they read this blog (and share it), and inspire me to do my very best (even if I am not feeling my very best).
- They are honest. I love that my friends will tell me when there’s spinach (or something else) stuck in my teeth. They’ll let me know if a dress really just isn’t working for me. They will be honest about my hair (and the color). They keep me grounded.
- They share in silliness with me! I have often dreamed of having the whole house to myself, quiet, with all the blankets I can stand, a fountain Coke, and Netflix (and maybe a sleeve or two of Oreos). I know that some of my friends would be over in a heartbeat to enjoy the Netflix binge with me, too. They laugh with me–belly laugh until we have snorted or fallen out of a chair. They cry with me. Again, when one of us hurts, we all hurt.
My friends are spread out all over–some are close by, others require a road trip, even a flight. I’d do it in a heartbeat, as long as I had all the money, time, and energy to pour into the “Friendship Tour,” I would.
But, for now, I enjoy the text messages, GIF’s, memes, Facebook messages, Snapchats, email, phone calls, and Marco Polo messages because sometimes that is what keeps us together (and sane).
I’m thankful for support–and as a military spouse, a caregiver, mom, teacher, sister, daughter, (the list goes on and on), we need that support. We need those shoulders to cry on. We need those Marco Polo conversations. Snail mail! It is real! We need little cards, notes, and makeup bags sent to us (because sometimes you leave a makeup bag in a friend’s car and she’s not down the road to get it). Those gestures remind us that our sisterhood is alive and well, and here to stay.
I’m thankful for the friends who don’t judge when I feed my kids fast food, for the friends who sometimes sneak to eat chocolate away from their kids like me. My friends who listen to the same music as me, can sing the same lyrics to Lady Gaga songs, and dance like no one is watching.
I care for my friends, who in the throws of life, chaos, work, motherhood, and all that jazz are strong, beautiful, passionate, and caring. I care that in those tiny moments of quietness, we have one another. It might be weeks, months, or years at times, but through it all we have one another and sometimes knowing that, knowing we are not alone…well, that’s all that matters.